Early this time last year we were building Oscar's cot, trying to have it ready for his arrival, hoping everything would go as planned and trying to imagine a real baby in there. It feels like a
world away and I've been reflecting on the everything that's been part of our first year together! Here are some things I would never have imagined would be part of the whole experience.
. The very first night. I somehow imagined the birth aftermath to be a peaceful time where you were allowed to rest and recover in perfect tranquillity, while cradling your newborn whenever you fancied. The reality is very hectic and between trying to stand up and brace the pain while changing pants/pads/trousers, I found I had to work around a catheter, while remembering to wake newborn Oscar up every couple of hours for a feed - what even was breastfeeding!? - or to clean up sticky black filled nappies with cotton wool. There were kind nurses around to help but it was so chaotic, and definitely my first taste of the sleepless nights to come.
. How uncomfortable baby sleep dep can be. People often speak of it and I assumed it to be just "one of those things" until I found myself in the deep end, feeling like I was struggling to survive. Days bled by in a blur and I couldn't go out or walk in a straight line, my surroundings throbbed around me. Light began to break through the tunnel at around three months, when Oscar started sleeping for three to four hours at night: it felt like a miracle!
. That I would be given magical fairy nails. From when I had Oscar, I found birthing came with a happy perk: my nails blossomed in to strong, shiny elongated rectangles with milky white tips. They lasted about five months before I gradually managed to whittle them back down. They still feel in much better condition than they were pre pregnancy!
. How much I loved co sleeping. I was very anxious about Oscar falling asleep in our bed, yet had read about the benefits of co sleeping, so we eventually decided to get the Chicco Next 2 Me crib rather than a Moses basket. It made things so much easier to slide Oscar in and out of bed in the night and to roll over and be able to see his face. I had read many reviews but I never predicted how useful our co sleeper cot would become or how grateful I would be to have it.
. That I wouldn't bond straight away. For at least the first three months I didn't emotionally have any bond with my newborn baby boy. I talked and sang to him, I held him and performed all of my duties but all the while I was so worried because I didn't feel anything for him. As time went on I realised that the newborn stage definitely wasn't my favourite and that I needed Oscar's feedback and smiles in order to bond with him and know he appreciated me. As he began to smile, laugh more and more and became much more aware of his surroundings and of his little family, I felt a bond quickly begin to grow and fell in love with experiencing all of his firsts with him!
. How quickly clothes are suddenly too small. I had an inkling before I had Oscar that I shouldn't buy in too many newborn sized suits but little did I realise that I should already be buying in his 9-12 month sized items! He usually grows out of his suits feet first, where he will wear one for 2 weeks and suddenly it will cramp his toes. I then trim the 'feet' off in the hope that it will last another
. That those short sleeve baby suits are actually vests. I didn't really imagine that babies wore vests and so they must don these little white uniforms come summertime, I assumed. Cue embarrassing moments shortly after labour when neither Mitch nor I knew how to dress Oscar, which layers to put on first or which popstuds go where!
Thank you so much for reading and following my Oscar story and updates!! ♡
You can find them all here or check out our little album in progress here. A few days ago I contracted a nasty virus and have been keeping away from my online devices as I felt too ill. My poor little lamb has unfortunately caught it from me and is severely off his foods, so I will be spending some time to look after him and watching Waybuloos. I will reply as normal!